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Mayonnaise Jar and 2 beers

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle,
when 24 hours in a day are not enough,
remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
and had some items in front of him.

When the class began,
he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students
if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles
and poured them into the jar.

He shook the jar lightly.

The pebbles rolled into the open areas
between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand
and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full.

The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table
and poured the entire contents into the jar,
effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor as the laughter subsided,
‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things
- your family, your children, your health,
your friends and your favorite passions -

And if everything else was lost and only they remained,
your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter,
like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued,
‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff
you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children.

Spend time with your parents.

Visit your grandparents.

Take time to get medical checkups.

Take your spouse out to dinner.

Play another 18.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

Take care of the golf balls first -
the things that really matter.

Set your priorities.

The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand
and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled and said,
‘I’m glad you asked.’

The beer just shows you that
no matter how full your life may seem,
there’s always room for a couple of beers with some friends.

:)

Manipesto ng Tunay Na Lalake

strungfromthemoon:

thepaperstar:

chuicide:

geekyrappinghood:

1. Ang tunay na lalake ay di natutulog.
2. Ang tunay na lalake ay di nagte-text-back, maliban na lang kung papasahan ng load. Gayunpaman, laging malabo ang kanyang mga sagot.
3. Ang tunay na lalake ay laging may extra rice.
4. Ang tunay na lalake ay hindi vegetarian.
5. Ang tunay na lalake ay walang abs.
6. Ang tunay na lalake ay hindi sumasayaw.
7. Ang tunay na lalake ay umaamin ng pagkakamali sa kapwa tunay na lalake.
8. Ang tunay na lalake ay laging may tae sa brief.
9. Ang tunay na lalake ay di naghuhugas ng pinagkainan o nagliligpit ng kanyang mga gamit dahil may babaeng gagawa noon para sa kanya. Mas lalong nagiging tunay ang pagkalalake kung di niya kilala o di niya maalala ang pangalan ng babae.
10. Ang tunay na lalake ay di nagsisimba.

(via Hay Men!)

HAHA. Fonneh.

 …………………………………………..I don’t mind if the guy I like isn’t a real man then. HAHAH.

Ang tunay na lalake ay hinding hindi lalampas sa’kin. At kung pagpilitan ang sarili, ang tunay na lalake ay matutuhod sa kanyang mga-

Interview with God

INTERVIEW WITH GOD
I dreamed I had an interview with GOD.
“So you would like to interview me?” GOD asked.
“If you have the time,” I said.
GOD smiled.
“My time is eternity…
What questions do you have in mind for me?”
“What surprises you most about humankind?”
GOD answered…
“That they get bored with their childhood,
they rush to grow up,
and then long to be children again.”
“That they lose their health to make money,
and then lose their money to restore their health.”
“That by thinking anxiously about the future,
they forget the present,
such that they live in neither the present nor the future.”
“That they live as if they will never die,
And die as though they had never lived.”
GOD’s hand took mine, and we were silent for awhile.
Then I asked,
“As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons you want your children to learn?”
“To learn they cannot make anyone love them,
all they can do is let themselves be loved.”
“To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others.”
“To learn to forgive, by practicing forgiveness.”
“To learn that it only takes a few seconds
to open a profound wounds in those they love
and it can take many years to heal them.”
“To learn that a rich person is not one who has the most,
but is one who needs the least.”
“To learn that there are people who love them dearly,
by simply do not yet know how to express or show their feelings.”
“To learn that two people can look at the same thing
and see it differently.”
“To learn that it is not enough that they forgive one another
but they must also forgive themselves.”
“Thank you for your time,” I said humbly.
“Is there anything you’d like your children to know?”
GOD smiled and said…
“Just know that I’m here”
“ALWAYS”

Why we are in a mess!

Not really certain about the veracity of these quotes, but somehow its quite funny how some Pinoys choose to manage their country’s affairs.
_____________________
This probably explains why we are where we are right now. Enjoy. MABUHAY ANG PILIPINAS!!!

In case you haven’t read this, it is too good not to be passed on to all.

A friend has been a Travel Agent for 30 Years. She says 30 of her years of taking reservation requests from government officials explains why we are all in in trouble. Here’s a few choice reservation questions from these bright people:

1) Senator Tessie Oreta asked for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn’t get messed up by being near the window.

2) I got a call from ex-Mayor Joey Marquez, who wanted to go to Capetown. Explaining the length of the flight and passport information, he interrupted me with, ‘I’m not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts . Without trying to make him look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, ’ Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Capetown is in Africa ..’ His response …..(click).

3) Congressman Mark Lapid called, furious about a Florida package we did for him and tv star Kris Aquino. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that was not possible since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, ‘Don’t lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!’ (so he expected to see the ocean on both sides of the hotel?!)

4) Sen Ralph Recto’s wife (actress Vilma Santos) asked, ‘Is it possible to see England from Canada ?’ I said, ‘No.’ She said, ‘But they look so close on the map…’

5) Senator Lito Lapid asked if he could rent a car in Dallas . I noticed he had only an hour lay-over in Dallas . When asked why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ‘I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between the gates to save
time.’

6) Senator Jinggoy Estrada (son of Erap) called last week. He needed to know how it was possible that his flight from Detroit left at 8:20 a.m. and got into Chicago at 8:33 a.m.. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but he could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told him the plane went very fast, and he bought that!

7) Congressman Ronaldo Zamora asked, ‘Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?’ I said, ‘No, why do you ask?’ He replied, ‘Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I’m overweight. I think that is very rude!’ I looked into it and explained the city code for Fresno , California is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.

8) Former presidential candidate, now tv star Eddie Gil inquired about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, he asked, ‘Would it be cheaper to fly to California and take the train to Hawaii ?’

9) I just got off the phone with Senator Bong Revilla who asked, ‘How do I know which plane to get on?’ I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ‘I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them..’

10) VP Noli De Castro asked, ‘I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , FL. Do I have to get on one of those twin engine planes?’ I asked if he meant fly to Pensacola , FL on a commuter plane. He said, ‘Yeah, whatever!’

11) Congressman Dilangalen called and had a question about the documents needed to fly to China . I reminded him he needed a visa. ‘Oh, no I don’t. I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those.’ I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this, he said, ‘Look, I’ve been to China four times and every time they accepted my American Express!’

12) Senator Miriam Defensor called to make reservations, ‘I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .’ The agent said, ‘Are you sure that’s the name of the town?’ ‘Yes, what flights do you have?’ replied the lady. After some searching, the agent came back with, ‘I’m sorry, ma’am, I’ve looked up every airport code in the country and can’t find a Rhino anywhere.’ The lady retorted, ‘Oh, don’t be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!’ The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ‘You don’t mean Buffalo , do you?’ ‘That’s it! I knew it was a big animal,’ she said.

Now you know why the Philippine Government is in the shape that it’s in.